Dear Diary,
My best friend graduated today! For some reason, it got me thinking.
On my journey of self-discovery and mental security, I’m starting to notice little things changing here and there. Some of them are small, like having the energy to cook or clean. I find myself wanting to applaud myself for organizing an entire room. For most, this is no feat worthy of celebration. But for me, this means something. This is progress. Celebrating small wins like these has become a significant part of my mental health recovery.
The progress doesn’t stop there. It follows me in all aspects of my life. Suddenly, I’m beginning to realize how a clear mind affects all sorts of things. Something that was a bit unexpected was how it would affect my friendships. The importance of friendship in my personal growth journey cannot be overstated.
When I was accustomed to living with mental illness, I rarely let love pour into me. My mind would not allow me to be free from isolation. Until I finally became mentally secure, I was unable to believe in the love people tried to sell me. Despite my reluctance, some people decided to give me their love for free. Supportive friendships played a crucial role in helping me through those tough times.
It’s those who gave their love for free who got me through my darkest times. Those who tried to help me when I didn’t want to help myself. I realized that my healing was not just for me, but for the village of people who pulled their weight in getting me through each day. Creating strong friendships was a key factor in overcoming isolation and achieving mental wellness.
I decided that I owed it to them to try my best to enjoy life. I didn’t want to sense the fear in their interactions with me anymore. I wanted them to feel the same joy I feel when I witness their happiness. Believe me, Diary. I know it was such a privilege for me to get to this point in my mental health journey. I’ll forever be grateful for the experiences I’ve had because of it. Gratitude and mental health go hand in hand, and I cherish these moments deeply.
Wait, Diary, that gives me a great idea! I should put my polaroids (yes, I’m a polaroid person) in a scrapbook or box or something. It can be like a treasure box! This will be such a cute way for me to remember all of the cute memories I’ve made with my friends over the years. Even if the version of me in the photograph was struggling, I can still look back on the memories fondly because of the love shared in those moments.
Overall, I guess what I’m trying to say is that I get to experience my friendships a lot more authentically now. I am able to experience the joys of life that my loved ones have so desperately wanted me to embrace. Without sadness being the center of my life, I am able to show up for my friends more often. It’s really important to show up for people. I learned that from my friends.
Diary, I’ll leave you with this. Always cherish the people who have loved, continue to love, and will love you. I know I do.
Love,
Morgan
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